Tuesday, June 10, 2008

you're so vaaaaiiinnn....

hooray for me I started working out again.

and I have to make a confession. I'm really ridiculously vain while I'm at the gym.

However, I promise you there is a rhyme and reason to this. its not purely empty shallow behavior, there is a motive behind it.

and it goes a little something like this...

I am not a runner. at all. ask anyone. If I were being chased by a mugger/kidnapper/murderer, I'd be screwed. I was never the person who went for long runs to "clear my head" or enjoyed the stabbing pain akin to 9,000 knives ripping apart your lungs. I never got that "urge" to just throw on some spandex and pound the pavement ad nausea. I was the girl driving by these people and shaking my head. Now don't get me wrong. I admire these people. Everytime my lazy, driving, bum drives past someone out for a nice longgg run, I think wow, good for them. and then i head home to the sanctity of my apartment.

As I've gotten older, I realize that gravity is only going to get meaner. I've never had good metabolism to begin with and I quickly came to the realization that exercise and I would have to bury the hatchet. I decided the best place to make amends with my inner hatred for running would be at my local gym. I mean, let's not get ahead of ourselves here kiddos, i'm willing to exercise (in an air-conditioned building with TVs on every piece of equipment), but I'm not gonna jump the gun. Like any good relationship, it takes time and lots of fostering to make this work.

So I joined a gym, a gym with treadmills. a gym with treadmills that have TV's attached.

and here is where the vanity sets in.

As I'm huffing and puffing my way through this routine, I am overtly aware of what I look like while doing this. My face gets red (thanks Irish curse), I sweat profusely and I'm pretty certain there's a fair amount of jiggle happening (I'll spare you the details of where). However, the other day the TV wasn't working on the treadmill so I was left to my ipod and the blank screen staring back at me. Suddenly, the light from the afternoon sun hit the screen and a my reflection filled the screen. it was me. a running me. a running me sans sweat, redness and jiggle. Instead, I had the perky ponytail thing going and I actually LOOKED like a runner. It got me really excited. So excited I ran an extra 8 minutes longer than I was planning on (which, hey, is a big deal for me!)

from that day forward, I've kept the tv off and I've stared at myself as I ran. It's way better than a mirror because its like the slightly blurred, hidiing-all-the-flaws version of myself. and you know what? it works.

So I will happily admit my vanity to the whole world. Yes, I stare at myself while I run on the treadmill.

but hey it works. try it!


bstalks.com said...

Your pimping worked! I saw your post on Jen Lancaster's blog and thought I would check you out!

Kym said...

haha i heart polos and pearls. haha how true. sometimes not at the gym tho. i am a hot mess and enjoy being engrossed in celeb gossip to make the minutes go by quicker. it also gives me the illusion that the treadmill/elliptical is a lot more glamorous than it actually is.

Grace said...

haha! Sweet! I'm am so trying that. I am such a bad treadmill-er. I can't watch my own tv; my eyes are constantly on the screen of the person (usually hardcore sprinting it) next to me. Rock on for the perky pontail running. I've gotta try that.

also found you through Jen's 'pimp yourself'

Emily said...

Haha! Sounds like something I would do!

Little Bow Prep said...

I just started reading blogs and have discovered your blog.

I love the Audrey pics on your blog!

Sarah Elizabeth said...

I also saw your pimping on Jen's blog! I love reading your stuff because I find so many similarities! Regarding to the working out with TV's - I am the same way. If there is not something to take my mind off of the tedious-ness of running I simply can not do it. FYI - if you REALLY wanna take your mind off of it, join a gym with a movie theater. My old gym had a room with a movie theater screen and instead of seats - cardio equipment! It was literally the only way I could do it...ever since I quit I haven't worked out.

Europafox said...

Love your site! And, going back to one of your previous posts, I feel your pain re. Lost, I am truly addicted to that programme!